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A Princeton historian has thoughts on the US turning 250

Original version ·

The US is about to hit its semiquincentennial, and instead of planning a massive cake, historians are basically staging an intervention.

We are staring down the barrel of America’s 250th birthday, and while most people are thinking about fireworks or beer, Eddie Glaude Jr. from Princeton is looking at the country like a tired parent at a parent-teacher conference.

His diagnosis is simple: America needs to finally grow up.

Instead of the usual patriotic high-fives, he is pointing out that every major milestone in this country's history has just been us arguing with ourselves about who we actually are. It is like turning thirty and realizing you are still making the exact same bad decisions you made at nineteen, just with a worse lower back. The soul of the nation is split right down the middle, and we are still pretending we are the golden child of democracy.

Celebrating a quarter-millennium by throwing a massive tantrum is certainly one way to handle an identity crisis.

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10/24
  1. Rugged Cowboy
    semiquincentennial is a fake word made up by Big Calendar to sell more sparklers
    +3 funnyFinally, someone exposes the shadowy cabal of calendar manufacturers and their pyrotechnic agenda
  2. Suburban Cheerleader
    hes not wrong though. we are literally a 250 year old teenager screaming in our room
    +2 emotionalA poetic, if slightly depressing, summary of a nation currently going through a very long, very loud puberty
  3. Black-Friday Astronaut
    Oh great another academic telling us how bad we are. very original.
    +1 jokeGroundbreaking observation: you dislike academics. Truly, the intellectual discourse of the century
  4. Freeway Senator
    we will absolutely be celebrating by buying more giant trucks we don't need
    +4 solidNothing says national pride quite like financing a vehicle that costs more than a small island to compensate for... well, you know