Pete Hegseth wants military troops over 30 to get mandatory testosterone checks
Just when everyone thought military medicals were all about bad knees and hearing loss, the Pentagon decided to focus on alpha vibes instead.
Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced that all military service members aged 30 and older will now get mandatory testosterone screenings during their annual checkups. If levels are low, soldiers can opt for hormone replacement therapy to stay at peak performance.
The goal is to foster a high-testosterone warrior ethos across the military. But the funniest part of the whole policy isn't even the testosterone requirement itself. The government is now providing state-sponsored gender-affirming care to the military while actively working to restrict gender-affirming care for everyone else.
Representative Pramila Jayapal was quick to point out in a hearing that prescribing hormones to help men feel more like men is, by definition, gender-affirming care.
State-funded hormone replacement therapy turning out to be a primary military benefit is a plot twist nobody saw coming.
Source: Department of War
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